Need a break? No worries. We’ve got you covered with some good old fashioned random bits of internet. Today’s fine selection comes from some especially funny Tweeters and Tumblrs and terribly terrific typers who have whipped up just the right balance of lols to give your brain the boost it needs.
So without further ado, enjoy a breather with these 10 particularly priceless posts.
10. Use the force
Man, ever since Rise of Skywalker suddenly EVERYBODY’S a Palpatine. So predictable.
Wife: wtf is this pile of clothes doing on the floor?
Me: I struck down a Jedi.
W: god I hate you.
M: yes, use your hate
— Gringo Brulee (@GringoBrulee) September 19, 2014
9. Water water everywhere
Why get high when you can get hydrated?
I used to think coffee was a grown-up drink. Then I thought alcohol was a grown up drink. Now I have finally achieved full enlightenment to understand that it is water that is the grown-up drink
— Tadashi Jr. (@JrHisaiah) April 8, 2019
8. The gig economy
Hold on, gotta go write my new screenplay “Sub-Contract Killer.”
The most Chinese story today. A man in Guangxi paid 2m to have a competitor killed. The guy kept half, hired another for 1m, then another until the 5th was hired for 100k. Figured not worth to kill for so little, he contacted the target trying to fake a death. All 6 in jail now.
— William Wong (@cowboyInNY) October 18, 2019
7. Spill that tea
Look, I’m not here to relax, I’m here to explode into my own brain.
– many flavours
– the answer to all problems
– Anxiety Juice™
– 3 heartbeats for the price of 1
– more than 4 cups and you can talk to electricity
— ruby? (@roobeekeane) September 13, 2019
6. Under a full moon
She’s connected to something very ancient and powerful and you should respect that.
My father-in-law told everyone to be quiet so he could say grace.
My 2-year-old howled like a wolf.
She worships the old gods.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 26, 2016
5. Crunchwrap supreme
There is absolutely nothing a-peeling about this.
do u guys eat ur burgers with or without the peel? pic.twitter.com/Z4AqIcBPe3
— glsk 桜 DE (@xCatgirls) May 10, 2018
4. Do ya like jazz?
Dude, just use the buzzer next time.
3. Love/hate relationships
The great thing about pets is they have no idea what you’re saying.
2. Holey Yeezus
Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat on a wage.
1. All the news that’s fit to print
Yes this is how the majority of journalistic output makes me feel as well.
Hope that was a nice break! If it wasn’t long enough, we recommend scrolling back up and reading it again. You can literally do it for free all day if you want. We won’t mind, and we won’t tell.
Who are the funniest people to follow on the internet right now?
Tell us in the comments.