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What’s happening on Twitter lately? Well, everything, really. Any and every subject you can possibly imagine is being yelled about daily on the massive platform. But my favorite parts are the funny ones. Particularly things like these recent funny tweets from some of the women of Twitter.

Get out your popcorn and prepare to chortle, snort, and chortlesnort (I don’t know what that last word means but it sounds like a Pokemon).

12. Height hype

Some of us keep a perfectly average sized distance, thank you very much.

11. Double checking

Can’t tell if this is severe insecurity or just prudent scheduling habits.

10. Let’s talk about text, baby

Yeah most of us aren’t some kind of sext Hemingway.

9. Make that money

Who could possibly sit in judgement?

8. Story time

Ok just don’t spoil it for me.

7. Die not trying

This is the best worst advice.

6. Female & sail

I for one voted for “Boaty McBoatface”

5. Scary stories to tell in the dark

There are so many words in the English language, surely we haven’t discussed all of them yet.

4. Roller disco

A complete lack of furniture suddenly isn’t so pathetic, IS IT MOM?!

3. The last dance

As someone not in the mood for either of these things, I wish peace upon your household.

2. Simple plan

Oh no buddy.

1. Sweet 16

I wake up every day and give thanks to the good lord above that Snapchat did not exist when I was in high school.

Hope those made your day a little better – give ’em a follow for more good stuff.

Who’s your favorite person on Twitter right now?

Tell us in the comments.