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If you feel like you’re barely keeping things together and just making it all up as you go along, I’ll let you in on a little secret: literally all of us are doing that. Anyone who thinks they’ve got it all together is probably horribly wrong and insufferable to be around. The true human experience is a constant string of “Wait, what?” and it’s a beautiful thing to be celebrated.
Here are fifteen people on Twitter who are just doing their dang best.
15. Indecent proposal
What are friends for?
My cousin’s boyfriend proposed to her but she didn’t have her nails done lmao pic.twitter.com/FUwwplzkYg
— Jenna (@goodgaljenjen) November 3, 2018
14. Delayed response
Better just keep everything in boxes for the next move.
Please excuse the mess, we just moved in 2 years ago
— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) June 21, 2019
13. Personal effects
If that’s your biggest worry you’re living on easy street.
If I die, I hope my best friend deletes my browser history.
Just so nobody knows that I was looking up how to use “effect” and “affect” properly in a sentence.
— Participation Trophy Wife 🏆 (@TrophyWifeDayna) August 5, 2020
12. Down on the ranch
This is what’s known as a “Midwestern Baptism.”
So a couple days ago, one of my coworkers accidentally let 22 quarts of ranch dressing slip out of her hand… pic.twitter.com/cMDwUAqfOZ
— G (@BorboaGrant) March 18, 2019
11. No service
What would you say is your shirt situation?
was so proud of myself for remembering my mask I forgot my entire shoes. now I’m in the grocery parking lot like ok what now Biblo
— ditch pony (@molly7anne) August 5, 2020
10. Curriculum vittles
Clearly I was trying to tell you that I’m simple and delicious.
Applied for a job and got this email back pic.twitter.com/6zI3cBnTLD
— Leonardo DiCaprisun (@Heathernab) February 6, 2015
9. Morning buzz
Sharing is caring, Meg.
Turns out the cream I’ve been putting in my coffee each morning that I brought home from Africa has an alcohol content of 17% .. no wonder I’ve been having such great days lately
— meg (@mmmobrie) June 6, 2018
8. Too chicken?
It’s in the Lord’s hands now.
I trust Chick-fil-A so much that I don’t even check my bag and if they get my order wrong I just assume they know what’s best for me.
— IF YOU ARE NOT BLACK THIS ISNT FOR YOU (@sirHASHington) June 8, 2018
7. Pronunciation anxiety
You will now say this word out loud in four different ways and none of them will sound right.
total crapshoot every time i go to pronounce ‘turmeric’
— JEFF NEWTON 🆒 (@yonewt) August 5, 2020
6. Have your fill
“I’ll take care of this tomorrow” is the greatest lie we ever tell ourselves.
me pulling into my driveway with my tank on E deciding that's a problem for future me vs. me the next morning leaving for work 15 mins late and realizing i have to stop for gas pic.twitter.com/XQTFz8d0J2
— casey mcquiston ⚡️ preorder ONE LAST STOP (@casey_mcquiston) March 20, 2018
I think your garden may be mutating?
ok do not judge me, the words most disorganized gardener: wtf am I growing here ? is this a cantaloupe? I did not plant cantaloupe. help pic.twitter.com/fcTUdcXO9d
— ditch pony (@molly7anne) August 1, 2020
4. Grand theft auto
This is too much for me to handle.
Who among us hasn't been locked out of a car in a parking lot, repeatedly yanked on the door handle and started kicking the door in anger until the real owner of the vehicle shows up?
— Melanie Gibson (@ImMelanieGibson) August 5, 2020
3. The domino effect
Frankly it’s none of your business, financial institution.
My bank called me: "sir did you go to dominos at midnight three days in a row in Florida?"
Bank:*long pause* "alright then"
— Soul Simpin (@honzogonzo) July 2, 2018
2. A najor problen
Isn’t technology wonderful?
I have a research paper due in 4 hours and the letter M on my keyboard is broken pic.twitter.com/WkUmmiSjak
— colin (@ColinChambers44) May 9, 2018
1. Cheetos never prosper
My will is about as strong as my diet.
Me putting my foot down and telling my friends I’m not drinking tonight pic.twitter.com/mTyPqnO3te
— FRANZ (@franzakeem) June 4, 2018
Let it be known that while writing this article I accidentally skipped half of it and had to go back because I was confused at how I had somehow forgotten to count. We really are just a bunch of hot messes.
What’s been your biggest “hot mess” moment lately?
Tell us in the comments.