This is always quite a conundrum, isn’t it? What do you say after you’ve just done the deed with someone?
Maybe the following answers will help you finally sort it all out?
AskReddit users shared their thoughts and we are HERE for them. let’s go!
1. That was a good one.
“One time after having some period s^x with an ex (if there’s a shower nearby, who cares?), she said “thank you for having s^x with me on my period”.
Never one to miss a joke opportunity, I replied, “thanks for having s^x with me, period.”
We laughed for a solid half hour, dated for a few more months, and split for something not related to how corny I am, I swear.”
2. Keep it light.
“After pulling out one time I said, “better out than in I always say.” She then responded with, “Did you just reference Shrek?!”
A good time was had by all.”
“We should urinate so our urethra passages are clear.
Given I’ve had several UTIs, including 3 that turned into kidney infections, that is just my style.”
4. A zinger.
“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, you are standing far too close and I would like to know what, precisely, your intentions are.”
5. Might never have s^x again…
“That was neat-o.
Then do the finger guns.”
6. Fill out the survey.
“How likely would you be to recommend this s^x to a friend?”
7. We have a poet on our hands.
We finished, and faded to black.
The urge had departed.
The questions were back.
But why, and who am I?
What happened to me?
Is this what I’ve come to?
Is this what I’ll be?
Is this how it ends,
in the wake of a wang?
And not with a whimper,
but really a bang?
A hollow enactment of lecherous love?
A labored performance of moans from above?
“What happened?” I whispered:
“I don’t understand.”
I sat there ashamed with my head in my hand.
I wiped at a tear with a tissue, and then –
I asked: “… are you ready to do it again?”
8. Always a good idea.
“Let’s go get pancakes.
I’ve legit said that to my GF a ton of times.”
9. Does that work?
“”That’s all folks!”
In as close to Porky Pig’s voice as you can manage.
Include the “abadeeabadeeabadee,” part, too!”
10. Way to go!
“”Good s*x” then handshake and smack on the butt.”
11. Two different ideas.
“My ex used to Voldemort hug me and whisper “well done, Draco” in my ear! Christ she was weird.
My current partner and I pretty much just lay there, high five and then go back to watching Hell’s Kitchen.”
12. In a robot voice.
Calculating escape route…”
13. This might not be the greatest idea…
“Keep the change you filthy animal!”
14. Let’s review…
“Tell them what you liked about what they did.
You can tell them what you didn’t like later (or ideally, during if it’s really not working for you; either way, the afterparty is a good time to keep it positive).
Everyone f*cks different, and it’s very encouraging to know that you hit on something that worked for your partner. It also encourages them to do the same for you, which will mean that a) you know you’ve got a trick up your sleeve for next time, and b) if you ever want to get them off quickly because your show’s about to start, you’ve got that magic button for when you want to wrap things up.
Open communication about your wants and desires is key, especially with someone you plan on f*cking again. A little post-coital play-by-play can do wonders for your s^x life.”
15. A timeless classic.
“Very nice” in Borat voice.”
16. Well, that’s nice.
“My partner and I always say “I love you” after s*x.”
Well, those sure gave me something to think about…if I ever have s^x again…
Now we want to hear from you!
Tell us what your post-s*x remarks are in the comments!