“What’s some juicy gossip you just found out in your personal lives?”

That’s all it took for reddit to unleash a torrent of the tastiest gossip you’ve sampled in quite some time. Because let’s face it, we ALL want to share gossip, but most of us can’t because we know it could hurt people. But sharing anonymously? What’s the harm in that?

Climb aboard the Gossip Train, because it’s leaving the station and we’re headed to Hilarity Junction! *toottoot*

1. Bold move

My friend sent me a screenshot of some dudes tinder bio that said “married. No, she doesn’t know I’m on here, and I plan to keep it that way.”

With multiple pictures of his face.

2. These parents need to talk more

That my brother asked my mom for a $1000 for rent, she gave him $1400 so he could also pay back a loan. Then he turned around and also asked my dad for $1000 for rent which he also gave him. He then turned around and used the money to buy tickets to burning man.

My parents aren’t going to lend out anymore money without talking to each other first.

3. When religion doesn’t work

Our pastor was having an affair with his cousins wife.

One day while giving a sermon the cousin storms into church, tackles the pastor and starts to throw haymakers at him. The cousins wife is trying to pull her husband off the pastor.

The pastor’s wife quickly figured out what was happening, ran up and clocked the wife from behind knocking her out. People are trying to separate everyone.

Total chaos.

4. How did he pull it off for that long?!

My cousin has been together with his wife for 14 years and has had a girlfriend for just as long! Neither of them knew about the other. He got caught because of an image on Facebook.

His wife’s sister posted a family picture which my cousin was in and got recognized by his girlfriend’s sister’s acquaintance.

He got away with that for FOURTEEN YEARS!

5. F*ke kids

I have a coworker I’ll call Jess, who always talks about her kids in detail and asks for favors because of her kids; ie picking up shifts, asking for rides, etc…

One of our other coworkers son goes to the same bar as said girl (she doesn’t know who he is) and one night was spilling her guts about how she always takes advantage of her coworkers and that she doesn’t even have kids.

She doesn’t know that we know.

6. But does it really matter?

My two friends just found out they have the same sugar daddy.

They had both been under the impression that they were exclusive with him.

7. Good for her?

My hairdresser is leaving her husband and 5 kids to marry an Italian basketball player.

8. Well, that escalated quickly

Some girl in our year at school posted on facebook the other day how her boyfriend had supposedly cheated on her. They had a full blown argument in the comments just on facebook for everyone to see.

Yesterday she posted a picture of some keys tagging her boyfriend in it saying “just bought our first house together!”

9. Cheaters gonna cheat

Recently got my AncestryDNA results back and found out I have a half sister of a different ethnicity, as a product of my father’s cheating ways…

10. sh^t is gonna go DOWN tonight!

My coworker makes $10 an hour works part time and pays for her live-in, still married, boyfriends rent and CHILD SUPPORT cuz he’s “broke.”

She just found his bank receipt showing $17k in his checking account.

11. Damn kids!

I just found out my neighbour has been having an affair with another one of my neighbours and the kids figured it out.

I used to see them go jogging sometimes.

12. Cats and dogs…

Well my dog acts like she doesn’t like our new cat BUT I caught them playing last night and as soon as she noticed me she runs over to me pretending she wasn’t playing! Scandal!!

I have no life – this was the peak of my weekend.

13. The daring couple

A couple that we have been friends with for a few years now, both very normal people with vanilla jobs, took a trip overseas that was supposed to last a week.

Not unusual for any of our group of friends.

No one had heard from them for close to a month until we found out they’ve been arrested on the other side of the f*cking earth trying to smuggle out close to 1 f*cking million dollars for an international drug cartel out of the country they where visiting.

When we heard the news we where just sitting there quietly in disbelief for about 5 min…

14. Hey! You dead!

I found out from an insurance company that I was dead.

Turns out when I went off to Uni my father tried to take me off his insurance and the company wanted to charge a fee for changing the insurance policy. He then asked whether they would charge if I had died, they said no, he then declared me dead.

Thanks dad.

15. Three apparently is not a crowd

I know a guy who got his friend to marry him so he can get a green card. Except his friend was already in a relationship.

Not only did my friend get married, he also inherited a boyfriend-in-law.

Now the three of them live in the same house.

16. How do you know this?

My friend has a birthmark on his p*nis.

17. So THAT explains it!

One of the girls in our group of friends has never really gotten over her ex that left her 3 years ago. She will often bring him up when drunk and it has really hampered her dating life.

He lives thousands of miles away, and today he posted a picture of him sitting with an attractive dude getting coffee. They are holding hands and their legs are touching.

We were all sitting around the TV hanging out when she saw the picture. Shell shock is the best description for her face.

18. DNA never lies

My grandpa had a secret Alaskan family no one knew about.

Thanks 23 & Me!

19. Oh damn…

Manager is having threesomes with two servers.

Does your life feel a little bit more boring now? Because mine does. I haven’t had any gossip THAT good for a long time

Thankfully, there’s the internet. And maybe it’s better that way.