It used to be, before the year 2020, that at least some of us dreamed of being able to stay home most of the time as opposed to being forced out into the world with others.
Now, of course, we realize that we need to be careful what we wish for – because we forgot to dream specifically about being home alone and not with the rest of our family underfoot trying to live their own best lives online.
These 25 people entertained themselves by listening in on their family and then posting the funniest quotes online, and I’ve gotta say, it seems like a pretty good use of the time.
25. She’s just trying to save you the embarrassment.
And also her career.
— Molly B (@calvinhobbes25) April 20, 2020
24. I’m sure you still look beautiful.
Because no one should care what you weigh.
Forget the Freshman 15, I just put on the Covid 19#QuarantineQuotes
— SKnubes (@sknuble) April 20, 2020
23. Mind your business is the best advice a mother can give, honestly.
Maybe we should do a fire drill at my house.
I saw my next door neighbor’s kids locked outside their house today.
I called my neighbor and she told me to mind my own business, we were having a Home School fire drill.
— Cheryl Rick Klein (@cherylt2000) April 20, 2020
22. I don’t feel like I need to add anything here.
It’s really funny, though, right?
I start every day by saying to myself “it could be worse, I could be sharing a house with Donald Trump” #QuarantineQuotes
— ? Vicki ? (@Andwejigglelike) April 20, 2020
21. The ratty ones just won’t do for that work call tomorrow.
What would people think?!
My husband last night said, “we need to hurry up and get home. I need to wash my work pajamas ” #QuarantineQuotes
— Katie Garcia (@Hapagarcia08) April 20, 2020
20. That’s not something my parents would have ever said when I was in high school.
I was suuuuper popular, y’all.
“Boy, I sure wished somebody would toilet paper our house!” #QuarantineQuotes
— Ryan Bartholomee (@RyanBartholomee) April 20, 2020
19. There’s only one way to find out.
But you can always try again tomorrow.
My 10 year old on the way to the mailbox
“I just don’t know if my feet can carry me that far anymore”#quarantinequotes
— Heidi (@redoverred) April 20, 2020
18. Because sometimes it’s just really hard to wait until after bedtime.
And also no one has a bedtime anymore.
“Can you watch the kids for a minute, I’m going to eat my icecream in the bathroom.” #QuarantineQuotes
— Celene (@celenebeann) April 20, 2020
17. A lot less “winning money,” though.
And also less fun. Admit it.
Quarantine is like Vegas. No one knows what time it is or what day it is and everyone is drunk. #QuarantineQuotes
— Jody Pierce (@lonestarjody) April 20, 2020
16. Username checks out.
But I mean, she’s not wrong.
If you need 144 rolls of toilet paper for a 14-day quarantine, you probably should have been seeing a doctor long before COVID-19 #QuarantineQuotes
— Bitcoin Benny (@bennydoda01) April 20, 2020
15. I assume you said thank you.
And then maybe cried yourself to sleep.
I had a parent of one of my students tell me “You’re getting nothing but alcohol as gifts from now on!” #QuarantineQuotes
— Ryan Stilwell (@RyGuy0793) April 20, 2020
14. Hahahaha bless his heart.
It’s so sweet that he thinks he’s going to school.
Six year old son – “I don’t go to regular school anymore. I go to private school.” #quarantinequotes
— nkygirl (@pyounger29) April 20, 2020
13. Good, I’ve missed B.C.
Since it’s B.C.E. now, you know (history nerd here).
“BC will now be known as Before Corona.” -Myself#QuarantineQuotes
— Brendan Burke (BB) (@brendanburkeNRT) April 20, 2020
12. You have to have a certain number of signatures to get out.
And you can’t ask your family, because they definitely want to get rid of you.
When quarantine is over, let’s not tell some people. #quarantinequotes
— Gina DeVoogd (@GinaDeVoogd) April 20, 2020
11. Nobody wants that to happen.
It’s one of the only perks of this entire thing.
My son as he’s bringing a basket of laundry to the laundry room: “Mom, you’re going to need to wash this basket of pajamas or I will need to resort to wearing real clothes again.” ? #quarantinequotes
— Angela Southern (@Southern_AngieC) April 20, 2020
10. The answer to this question is obviously always yes.
It matters not how old you are.
My 32 year old husband looked at me the other day and said “sooo, do you want to build a fort”? And we did. #QuarantineQuotes
— Stefanie (@StefanieAlise) April 20, 2020
9. Now there’s an idea.
I like the outside the box thinking.
I’m sealing off the front room in the house so that I have somewhere to go on holiday in August.#QuarantineQuotes
— G of the Bang! (@JimBlower) April 20, 2020
8. Okay fine it’s funny.
And sad and funny idk either.
“Sad but true”- my aunt Kathy #QuarantineQuotes I didn’t know if I wanted to cry bc it was funny or bc I was sad. Sent to the group chat with my little sis and my cuz (8th graders). I’m a senior. 🙂 pic.twitter.com/a8bORV29nV
— Stephs ? (@Arias9J) April 20, 2020
7. This just makes me sad all the way around.
But I’m still keeping my dog inside for her own good, too.
” Now I understand why pets try to run out of the house when the door opens.” #QuarantineQuotes
— StratLadyK (@StratLadyK) April 20, 2020
6. I have no idea what this means.
You gotta keep people on their toes, I guess.
“It’s supposed to be good dining room weather today” #QuarantineQuotes
— ??????????? ???? ?’????? (@Chrisoshow) April 20, 2020
5. It’s the little things that get you going these days.
Like being able to sing this tweet, for instance.
— Bethanyyy (@BethanyFunnell) April 20, 2020
4. We all wish we hadn’t overheard that.
There are only 50 states still, right?
Well Trump just said he spoke with hundreds of Governors.
— no one you know (@evelynferry) April 20, 2020
3. Hahahaha what on earth.
I wonder if Mom knows?
I work in a grocery store and I heard a kid say “look dad, toilet paper! We can stop using mom’s old clothes.” #QuarantineQuotes
— vicki (@vickilovestacos) April 20, 2020
2. Yeah, I love my family but I could think of a few.
Idris Elba. Derek Jeter. Zac Efron. Kristen Bell…
I came downstairs and said to my family, “I can’t think of three people I’d rather be quarantined with.” My 11 year old IMMEDIATELY said, “OH, I CAN!” #QuarantineQuotes.
— Hank Pantier (@webhank) April 20, 2020
1. All the way down.
Because I don’t think we’ve found the bottom yet.
— Lisa Day (@LISA_DAY_) April 20, 2020
Did you have a good time stuck at home with your family? Or was it maddening?
I’d love to hear more stories about how you entertained yourselves and maybe even what you learned down in the comments!