I lived right near a spot of Lake Michigan beach for a couple of years in Chicago, and everytime I would stroll over there I’d take note of the flag.

As anyone who lives near a large body of water knows, they use flags to signify the safety of being on the beach / getting in the water at that time.

A yellow flag meant proceed with caution. A red flag meant get the f**k away.

Unfortunately, when it comes to the metaphorical red flags in our lives, we don’t always listen, as pointed out by Twitter user @objsucks:


What else had people encountered? Let’s find out.

10. That’s permanent

“Hey cool but this is like our second date.”

9. Bad nuggs

What kind of sociopath…

8. That’s a big ego

Was he compensating for something?

7. Not guilty

Was she perchance a juror?

6. Bless up

Which I’m sure she repeatedly insisted was no such thing.


5. Parasocial

That’s a lot of weird rules.


4. Sing me a song

You would lose me at “watched Glee.”

3. Happily ever after?

“Hey, you wanna come pay $50 to freeze to death watching something we could see better at home on TV for free?”

2. Opposites attract

What’s to understand? It’s not complicated.


1. Bad taste

Prince wasn’t bad at anything, ya’ll. Anything musical, anyway.


As we make our way toward the beaches that are our relationships, we must watch for the red flags that are the…flags of…that thing.

GOD I’m bad at metaphors. That’s probably some kind of red flag.

What warning signs have you ignored?

Tell us in the comments.