The people of the internet have been hard at work lately creating content designed specifically to distract me away from all the horrors of the world and provide me instead with quality laughs and entertainment. At least, I assume it’s all about me. I don’t know who else anyone would be trying to entertain. But, as I’m very generous, I guess I’ll share some of the funny things that have been showing up for me lately. Even though they’re definitely mine.

Here are 12 of the best tweets you probably haven’t seen yet.

12. Light it up

This is the kind of history lesson I’m here for.

11. Happy death day

That kid is going places, and I don’t want to be there when she arrives.

10. Philosophy 101

This is why I’m “not allowed in group anymore.”

9. Doggy dreams

(Click the photo, it’s adorable.)

8. Foxy

He’s just grabbing a quick rest, then he’s gotta bounce.

7. I scream

I basically have echolocation, like a bat.

6. The cycle continues

Gotta separate yourself from the herd.

5. The algorithm rhythm

Please…no more…

4. Drink up

Ah yes, I see, how silly of me to conflate the two.

3. Money isn’t everything

Did they sign it “Love” or “Sincerely?” I MUST KNOW!

2. The newest testament

When Starbucks starts acquiring religions this is how it’s gonna be.

1. Very a-peeling

This s**t really is bananas.

For this blessing of a smattering of amusing tweets to brighten your day, you are most welcome. I accept thanks in the form of pizzas and cash, or cash pizzas.

Who’s the undisputed champion of funny Twitter?

Give us your vote in the comments.