I set out to count how many funny people there were on Twitter but I eventually lost track and fell asleep because there are too dang many. I couldn’t possibly hope to bring you samples from all of them, but let’s start with these.
Here are 12 random examples of greatness from a few of the funny women of Twitter!
12. Act fast
This is why the remote is a powerful tool in any relationship.
My boyfriend is only fast at two things: fucking, and skipping over movies he knows I’d want to watch
— Myka Fox (@MykaFox) July 16, 2020
11. Mmm, MLM
You can be your own boss by which I mean empty your savings account to buy our awful overpriced merchandise.
https://twitter.com/NATCpod/status/1277634392396103681
10. Bras, bruh
There are the true tests of faith.
If God never gives us more than we can handle why did I just have a complete breakdown trying to put on a sports bra while wet?
— Missy Baker (@TheMissyBaker) July 19, 2020
9. Time to stretch
Me buying sweats: “I don’t think this is gonna work out.”
I own a lot of workout pants for someone who just eats all day
— Anna (@AnnaDoesntWant2) February 10, 2020
8. Fairy tale romance
Did no two women in this kingdom wear the same size shoe?
i personally think cinderella should have lived a happy life with all her animal friends rather than settle for a man who had her try on a shoe because he didn’t recognize her without makeup
— cor ❥ (@okiecorri) July 20, 2020
7. Hugs and nugs
The delicious affection that we all crave.
a guy at the salon is straight up feeding his girl chicken nuggets while she gets her nails done that's the kind of love & support i need
— lea adame (@leaadame) August 25, 2017
6. Model citizen
2020: “Joke’s on you, get back to the couch.”
*remodels entire home to make it more suitable for entertaining*
*invites no one over*
Ah, perfect.
— Sara Buckley (@nottheworstmom) March 12, 2018
5. Highs and lows
Um. Most of us were alive in the 1900’s. It was 20 years ago. You sure about this?
https://twitter.com/amoure_af/status/1284203729034653702
4. Who is she
Reminding the robots that they don’t know everything.
https://twitter.com/LetMeStart/status/1254539600279805952
3. Flatten the curve
The swoosh that says “Just don’t it.”
what i think ive done vs what ive actually done pic.twitter.com/nTevgH8eXu
— Jenna (@qwerticorn_ig) March 9, 2015
2. Treasure hunting
Gotta keep tabs on the important things in life.
My only current hobby and passion is tracking packages
— Mariya Alexander (@MariyaAlexander) April 8, 2020
1. Pocket full of disappointment
Fashion is a competition to see who can sell the least fabric for the most money.
Women: Give us pockets!
Fashion: How about shoulder cut-outs?
Women: We want pockets!
Fashion: Or one on your upper-abdomen?
Women: Really, just pockets!
Fashion: Have you heard about cut-out denim?!
Women: [evaporate in a cloud of rage] pic.twitter.com/NXnNpDXJPm
— Sophie Vershbow (@svershbow) July 11, 2018
To see more, just go pretty much anywhere on the internet. Funny tweets have a way of showing up there.
Who are your favorites ladies of Twitter?
Tell us in the comments.