I’ll be honest, when Twitter first came out all those years ago, I did not get it.

But now – a changed world later – I still mostly don’t get it.

What I DO get is that there are a lot of funny people being funny on there, and I need no more explanation than that for why I should hop on and enjoy myself as I ingest great little tweets like these.

12. Rules are rules

I am here for a good time, not a long time.

11. Shake it up

Your life flashes before your eyes and it’s mostly you on the toilet.

10. Lessons learned

Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off indefinitely.

9. Red alert

She’s putting a spell on you.

8. A royal pain

I can think of a few existing ones who were less than stellar.

7. So fancy

I don’t even try to pronounce it.

6. No apologies

You are who you are and that is beautiful.

5. Age appropriate

What’s my age again? What’s my age again?

4. In brief

I think they played out their entire relationship to get to this joke.


3. That’s nuts

Quite a spot-on diagnosis.

2. Pay the premium

Man, I swear, if they keep splitting up my content into even more streaming services I’m going back to pirating.

1. Low stakes

They did this already, friend. It’s called Animal Crossing, and it’s wonderful.


Well, there ya have it. A bunch of good tweets. Hope you enjoyed them as much as we did!

Who are your favorite people to follow on Twitter?

Tell us in the comments.