The Nextdoor app, a localized social media platform launched in 2011, describes itself this way:

“It’s where communities come together to greet newcomers, exchange recommendations, and read the latest local news. Where neighbors support local businesses and get updates from public agencies. Where neighbors borrow tools and sell couches. It’s how to get the most out of everything nearby.”

The screenshots, however? They tell very different stories, as this enterprising Twitter account proves.

Get ready to keep up with the Joneses.

15. Urgent Alert

Hey Patrick, why don’t you leave Gerb alone, he’s working on something.

14. Motel 6

I’d say somewhere between sorta and very.

13. Possible Cult Activity

“Went to the library to use the printer but this guy kept staring at me for an hour so to mess with him I just kept pulling up Gary Busey.”

12. Neighborly Consideration

I don’t know how to tell you this, but weekend afternoons are kinda the perfect time for mowing.

11. Found Orange Male Cat

“And believe me, I’ve seen a lot.”

10. Weed

Or maybe, you know, just “lawn maintenance.”

9. New Trash Policy

This is the greatest shade I’ve ever seen.

8. Big A** Bird

Can anyone identify?

7. Missing Newfoundland

You gotta read the room, Marlene.

6. More Vandalism

I don’t care what you say, this definitely isn’t gouda.

5. Suspicious Behavior

Quarantine has not been kind to many of us.

4. Contractor

Joshua swooping in with the completely unnecessary burn.

3. Truck Sandwich

Why are you questioning this? YOU HAVE BEEN BLESSED.

2. Question

Get a bucket and a mop.

1. Y’all Gonna Have to Sit Down

Big if true.

Be good to your neighbors. Because apparently they’re watching you.

What’s been going on in your neighborhood?

Tell us in the comments.