If you haven’t been acquainted with this particular personality yet, first of all, this is all going to be even stranger than it would be otherwise, and secondly, this guy is maybe the person who made the biggest impression yet on the controversially insane TLC reality series “90 Day Fiance.”
Basically, Ed, a 54 year old photographer living in California, had 90 days to woo a woman named Rose, who would need to decide by the end of that time period whether tying the knot was worth a permanent ticket to the States.
But as nuts as the premise alone is, the moments Ed brought us are something else entirely.
15. The age gap
First of all, Rose is 23. Ed has a daughter who’s literally six years older than that.
14. Is mayonnaise an instrument?
He wanted to look younger, so he died his hair, but then his scalp hurt, and he decided to sooth it…with mayo.
13. Sugar daddy
Here’s where he informed us he’d been talking online with Rose for 3 months…and had sent her $5,000 worth of gifts.
12. Space good boy
Oh, what’s this? Just the crazy-ass astronaut backpack he puts his dog in while he’s on his scooter.
11. New heights
Ed told Rose he was 5’2. He’s actually 4’11.
10. Long story short
Rose told him he was too short for her at like, minute one. This is not going well.
9. Shopping spree
They tried to go shopping. They had to call it off because he was sweating too much and oh yeah, Rose kept grabbing his money.
8. Don’t get testy
There was the time he asked rose to get an STI test so he could feel comfortable sleeping with her.
7. Halik halik, bang bang
“Halik” means kiss in Filipino.
6. Shave off trade off
Rose didn’t like the feel of Ed’s beard. He agree’d to shave it…if she’d shave her legs.
5. You’d be friends
Ed asked Rose’s dad if he was cool with their relationship. Ed is older than her father.
4. Hose before…nevermind
Then there was this madness with a group shower and her dad and a…hose?
3. Pigging out
While visiting the family pig farm, he put plastic bags around his shoes to keep ’em clean.
2. Thoughtful gifts
There was the time he bought Rose a bunch of stuff for her bad breath.
1. Fightin’ words
She then informed him her breath was bad because of an ulcer. Then called him ugly in Filipino.
So! I think it’s pretty clear these two are absolutely meant for each other. What could possibly go wrong? How will the world keep spinning if we are denied the presence of this power couple? Thanks for bringing this love to us all, TLC. And thank YOU, Big Ed, for being you.
Have you watched the show much? What was your favorite part?
Tell us about it in the comments.