Have you ever had to “ghost” a friend before?
As someone who has, let me tell you it is not very pleasant.
But, some people are totally toxic and the time comes when you have to cut them out of your life even if it’s going to hurt their feelings.
AskReddit users shared their stories about how they ghosted their friends.
1. Get rid of that one.
“When I came home to find the power off. Bill hadn’t been paid.
We were friends from work. He had split up from his ex and I needed to be closer to work. We went 50 50 on a rental, he has three kids from the previous relationship.
With me being the nerd I agreed to pay the tech bills. Internet, phone, cable TV. He agreed to pay the power as he burnt more because his kids were over on access visits.
Came home. Dark house. Hmmmm. Investigate. He hadn’t paid the power for AGES because his new girlfriend wanted the money. Then I discovered he wasn’t paying his rent either, same reason.
Down $5k, power, rent, we were evicted. Ghosted.”
2. Don’t mess with my cat.
“We had been friends for years. Like long term sisterhood kind of sh^t. I did soooo much for her over the years and didn’t even bat an eyelash. I asked her to watch my cat while I went on a 10 day vacation (a cat that she also “loved” because it belonged to her family before me)
She agreed to watch the cat. I even called her about 4 days into my vacation to ask her again to go and check on my cat to make sure it had food/water and a few scritches. When I came home my cat’s water and food bowl were bone dry and she let out the most tormenting “meows” I have ever heard.
My “friend” didn’t check on her once in the 10 days that I was gone. She played stupid when I confronted her about it and said “oh! I completely forgot!” That was the beginning of the end.”
3. The friend cycle.
“She started hanging out with a new friend, that’s fine, I’m not her only friend. Then while we were hanging out, as pre-planned she would leave to go hang out with her new friend, then she’d break plans with me to hang out with her, all while tagging her on Facebook so none of it was being hidden.
Three years later she reaches out to me and apologizes, it’s genuine as she mentioned insightful things she would have no way of knowing unless she had grown and been very honest with herself.
We are friends for another two years when she starts to hang out with another new friend…repeat.”
4. Talkin’ trash.
“Started talking sh^t about me to my GF and best mate. His dad had a history of drinking problems and he was starting to exhibit the same behaviour, so i suggested we should both take a break from drinking for awhile and try to focus on some healthier sh^t.
He apparently took that as i’m not the same person and my GF was the person who changed me.”
5. The flavor of the month.
“Getting ditched every time there’s a new guy on the scene but then expected to be there the second it all breaks down.”
6. Always taking.
“I had a relationship that was really great for awhile, but over time I realized they just didn’t care much for me anymore.
It was always them needing something.”
7. Addicts don’t always mix.
“I loved this girl. She was so clutch for me when my life was in ruins. The issue was that she and I were both addicts at the same time and both came from the same types of affluent families, but for whatever reason – I got clean and I turned my life around while she got worse.
She and I were both addicts with eating disorders, alcoholism, and both addicted to Xanax.
I got clean and only recently (7 years later) have started experimenting with maybe one or two beers per month if I’m out with my husband. She ended up with this awful guy who she will not give up who got her hooked on meth. I was there for her for a long time. After rehab and a few arrests, she stayed at my house for a bit on two different occasions.
But the last time she did, she tore my house apart looking for alcohol (which we didn’t have), stole my ID so she could get postmates to deliver vodka to my house, and nearly got us both killed by grabbing and yanking my steering wheel while I was going 80mph up I-95.
I’ve tried so many times to help her get and stay clean, but she keeps going back to that guy and her triggers are my triggers. I had to distance myself because she was making me relapse.”
8. No regrets.
“She burned the bridge. For most of the year and a half that she and I started working at the same place, she bullied me, micromanaged me, made me feel left out, and gaslighted me whenever I tried to confront her behavior.
It was almost always my fault, nothing I ever did was right, and she refused to believe that she has control issues or that she was using me as a punching bag. She started doing this thing where she wouldn’t text me unless I texted her first, and then get mad if I didn’t text her. So, once she quit the job, I stopped texting her.
I haven’t spoken to her at all since August 2019 and I don’t regret it.”
9. Back to me…
“Every conversation was about them and their lives. They rarely asked or were interested in what I had going on.
The selfishness was just too much after a while.”
10. A long time coming…
“I have a friend who I probably should have stopped talking to long before I did but his escapades include:
– Slept with my ex of 3 years a week or so after we broke up
– Got really handsy with my sister (against her will) at my 21st
– Just being a general creep to girls for a long time.”
11. Haven’t spoken to him since…
“He knocked on my door one night and said ‘Lets go for a drive”. This wasn’t that odd since I love driving to cool my head. So we start driving and maybe 10 minutes in, he starts directing me on where to go.
He asks me if I mind making a quick stop. I’m annoyed but say sure. We end up at this sketchy house in the middle of nowhere and my buddy goes inside, but tells me to wait in the car.
Almost 45 minutes later he comes back out and says we gotta go to the bar. It takes me about 10 seconds to realize this POS went in there to get coke and was already high.
So I tell him that I’m not feeling it tonight and drop him off at his place. Spoke to him once after that when he wanted to hang and I told him I’m nobody’s errand boy. Never gave a sh^t if he got the message because I haven’t spoken to him since.”
12. Not one of the “cool” kids.
“My “best friend” growing up was a kid I lived next door to from the age of 9 until 18. At school, he would pretend not to know me so he could seem cool to the popular kids. He would invite me places then ditch me. He would break plans so he could free up time to hang with his cooler friends.
That sh^t got real old, real fast. When I was 18 I moved to the other side of town. We were growing apart more and more but I would still try to hang out with him when I could. Well one day he asked me to come over to his house and play Tony Hawk’s ProSkater when it first came out.
I was so pumped that I walked 3 miles to his house only to be told that he was going to go hang out at his other friend’s house instead but could I babysit his brothers and sisters. Needless to say, things weren’t the same after that. I stopped answering his calls. He would stop by and I would leave just to avoid him.
He would make plans to hang out and I never bothered going. I just gave up on trying to be friends with that guy. I tried so hard for almost 10 years just to be a good friend to him and he just pushed me to the wayside.
Maybe I’m an as$hole for stooping to his level but I don’t care anymore.”
13. Blame games.
“Too much drama.
Told a sob story in order to garner sympathy points – story didn’t check out and no one believed her so she got even more angry about it. Decided to book it because her stories and blame-games were getting too much for me.”
14. So creepy.
“Her fiancee was arrested and did jail time for possession of child pornography.
When he got out, she married him and talked about how excited she was to have children with him.”
“Every time when there is a girl involved, this dude turns into the cringiest being there is. Trying so much to get laid. In a group chat, when 2 girls were talking about what to wear for their girls night out, he started bringing up panties, bras and what not.
I left that group, started a new one with everyone from the old group except him.”
Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes.
Have you ever had to ghost a friend for one reason or another?
If so, please tell us about it in the comments!