As early as the 16th century red flags have been used as as indication of danger – a warning that something bad is about to go down. I live in Chicago just a couple of blocks from the beaches of Lake Michigan, and when I see a red flag on one of my walks, I know that means “Stay away from the water, it’s not gonna go well for you.”

Sometimes the signals we encounter in our relationships are just about as clear – and yet we might be tempted to just keep swimming anyway. Take for instance the thousands of stories that came flooding in based on this prompt from silver_foks on r/AskReddit:

What’s the biggest red flag you’ve ignored because the sex was good?
byu/silver_foks inAskReddit

Here’s what just a few of the top comments had to say about red flags they’d encountered with women in particular. (A lot of this is NSFW.)

1. Fourth time’s the charm?

She was married and divorced 3 times by 27.

– Screamin_STEMI

2. You’re not always the protagonist of the story.

Probably the plethora of empty wine bottles around the apartment, and the knowledge that she’d just gotten out of a long term relationship.

Somehow it never dawned on me that I was the rebound guy.

– the5thbeagle

3. It doesn’t get much more direct…

She basically told me she might cheat on me if she had the opportunity with her ex.

It was my first relationship and I was as stupid as can be.

– Genocide_Fan

4. You can read it loud and clear.

We were in a hotel and she would just keep screaming at the top of her lungs.

I kept telling her to quiet down, but instead that only turned her on more.

Only continued because she was my girlfriend at the time and it was pretty good sex for me as well.

– StaticSh0T

5. I need a diagram for this one, please.

She was my ex-wife’s, husband’s ex-wife…

– mroozienelson

6. If they’ll cheat with you…

Had an affair with a married woman, she left her husband for me, married me, then cheated on me.

If that isn’t karma idk what is.

– G4V_Zero

7. Simple things can be very telling.

She got annoyed because I told her about a coworker who felt bad about cheating on her bf.

She said “just keep sh*t on the DL… Nobody has to know if you keep your f*cking mouth shut.”

Immediately knew someone else was deep in her guts.

– ItsJustRedditRelax

8. Narcissism?

She stared at herself in the mirror during sex.

Fully moaning, and cumming, but would never break eye contact with herself,

– ask-me-about-my-toe

9. After 5 whole months, my dude?

She cried when I just wanted to make out after our first date. She said I wasn’t serious if I didn’t want to f*ck her.

She was 46. And hot as f*ck. I was 31. Cougar time!

So I f*cked her. And the sex was great, but she was f*cking crazy and I bailed after about 5 months.

– Birdamus

10. What can we say but yikes…

She called me the n word all the time. We are not black.

– Arctic_Snowfox

11. Bragging is never a good sign.

All of the lying and bragging about how good she was at it, manipulations, caught her in a lie then caught her cheating and I still didn’t wanna let go.

That sh*t hurt deep for a long time.

– TerminalCrowbar

12. Old problems require old solutions.

I used to have a subscription to Playboy before I met this girlfriend and I’d leave them on top of the toilet for reading material

(before cell phones)

One day after getting situated on the throne I opened an issue and discovered my sweetie had taken a permanent marker…

and covered all the naughty bits on EVERY nude picture (even the tiny ads in the back)

It must of taken her hours to do all the issues

– smilingonion

13. When does a joke stop being a joke?

She was a racist f*ck.

Always said she was joking but I later found out she was entirely serious.

– kalanawi

14. Let me count the ways…

Oh god, so much.

Obsessiveness, narcissism, codependency, overt stupidity, laziness, lack of ambition, all kinds of stuff.

– inomenata

15. And then there’s this simple entry:

She kept f*cking my friends

– mochalatteicecream

Remember to listen to your common sense. And let that voice be louder than…yanno…others.

Do you have a story like this?

Share it with us in the comments.