I once had a roommate who adopted two dogs without really asking the rest of us, then proceeded to keep them in the garage most of the time, where they pooped absolutely everywhere.
It wasn’t good. I’m very glad to be out of that.
But the signs that you might be dealing with an awful roomie can be more subtle than that. Let’s look at a few red flags, from Twitter.
13. Culinary dog spillage
It’s not gonna happen often, but if it does, run away.
my roommate just tried to make a bread bowl by hollowing out an entire baguette and he spilled clam chowder on my dog
— Bris Angel (@Cryptoterra) May 18, 2015
12. The penny pinching
Seriously y’all, in most cases it all comes out in the wash.
living w roommates month 1: i bought us a new rug and some plants! dont worry about paying me its for all of us 🙂
month 6: can u venmo me 37 cents for using my ketchup
— eric curtin (@_ericcurtin) March 18, 2019
11. The one that got away
That’s a really good sign that things are gonna go great.
Me: You ever been on crazy date?
Him: I once had a girl bite me then say, “If you fuck me over, I’ll fuck you up.” Does that count?
Me: Omg! How is my old roommate, Jasmine?
— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) July 24, 2021
10. The heat miser
What kind of absolute monster…
My roommate is a psycho.
Woke up all sweaty af only to see that mf set the thermostat at 78 degrees
— Marco Antonio Solís jr (@tonibuki11) July 20, 2021
9. The case of the missing everything
Except for the times when it turned out to be you all along.
Having a roommate is like being a detective and all your mysteries have one suspect
— Quinton Reviews ? (@Q_Review) March 7, 2019
8. The cereal killer
I think you need to take her to some kind of hospital.
"How do you know you have a crazy roommate?"
She decided to take cornflakes with hot water, Lipton and sugar?
— African gyal??✨ (@_Melody01_) July 24, 2021
7. This shower power move
I admire it, and yet it infuriates me.
Told my roommate to stop putting her hair on the shower wall, came home to this pic.twitter.com/peNSPcELrK
— sydney murphy (@Sydney_Jordann) August 30, 2016
6. This strange turn of events
It’s the ones you never expect.
Bruhhhh I just saw my first crazy ass roommate is a therapist now ??
— kc ?? (@_carrak) July 22, 2021
5. Let’s get this bread
By absolutely any means necessary, apparently.
One of my flatmates opens their bread like this. I don't feel safe anymore. pic.twitter.com/z0BFhCZNeN
— Et Al (@Almckayy) March 6, 2017
4. Slim and trim
Well I don’t mind if he wants to ooooohhhhhhhh.
if u hear ur roommate using ur beard trimmer in the bathroom but they come out and look exactly the same u should buy a new beard trimmer
— chuuch (@ch000ch) April 8, 2016
3. This absolute knob
What would have been REALLY crazy is if she’d have turned it on first.
Thinking about how my last psycho roommate took the knobs off the oven so I couldn’t cook anything LMAO WHAT A LOSER
— ✩unpopular hooker✩ (@unpopularhooker) March 21, 2021
2. Arrested developments
Do keep us updated though, won’t you?
If you ever think you have a crazy roommate just remember that mine is currently trying to get me arrested
— Jason Mach (@JasonMach7) March 22, 2021
1. Boiling mass of garbage
I can’t read any more of these, my brain is about to explode.
one time I caught my roommate making hot chocolate from the water he boiled his hot dog in
— slick (@dlicj) July 10, 2017
I shudder to think what could be worse.
Who was the most awful roommate you ever had?
Tell us in the comments.