Quick question, do you have the time? I mean, you probably do have some extra time right now. But like, do you know what time it is? Does anybody? If Twitter is any indication, the answer to that question is a firm “No.”
When your usual routine gets thrown off, it’s amazing how quickly your entire outlook goes into disarray. Lucky for us, some of the responses are really funny. Like these!
15. Dish, girl
It’s kinda like how geological time is measured in rock layers.
The only reason I know days are passing is because the dishes keep on a piling.
— Ashly Perez (@itsashlyperez) April 20, 2020
14. Ok, Google
This is all just a part of their plot to make us fully rely on them.
Just asked my husband what day it is. He's Googling it. I'll get back to you all with the results.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) April 8, 2020
There’s a joke here about being “brief” that, to my eternal shame, I can’t seem to find.
I wish days of the week underwear were still a thing so I knew what the hell day of the week it is.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) April 1, 2020
12. Handy rhymes
Then another 90 days of fear,
For each month of the entire year
Thirty days hath September,
April, June, and November,
all the rest have thirty-one
Except March which has 8000
— brandAn is good (@LeBearGirdle) March 29, 2020
11. Time keeps on slippin’
Slippin’, slippin’, into the futuuuuure.
something keeps happening to me where I open an email and I’m like “I’ll reply to that in an hour” then I go to reply an hour later and it says I got the email 4 days ago
— Rachel Sennott (@Rachel_Sennott) April 3, 2020
Every day is Friday when nobody cares.
At least today is Friday
-Me on Wednesday during quarantine.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 25, 2020
I think maybe it’s Thruzeday?
Quarantine Diary Year 3- Fiercely fought with the husband over the day of the week. We were both wrong.
— Maryfairyboberry (@MaryJustice86) March 25, 2020
8. It never ends
It’s a band, I think?
What is a "weekend"?
— Charlotte Clymer ?️? (@cmclymer) March 27, 2020
7. It all makes sense
Ushering in a new era.
I finally understand what Usher meant by fiftyeleven days, umpteen hours.
— ?? (@NewWxve_) April 11, 2020
6. Back to the future
A simpler time when time was literally simpler.
I want to go back to a simpler time. Like before a single day lasted less than 87 hours.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) April 1, 2020
5. Nailed it
I mean, you have a clock and a calendar on your phone but ok.
Lost track of days. Loosely keeping track of time by monitoring how far my cuticles have grown out since my last pedicure.
— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) April 16, 2020
4. A hard day’s night
I should be sleepin’ like a log.
This day has been the longest week of my life.
— Sammy Rhodes (@sammyrhodes) March 25, 2020
It’s every day, every day.
8: what day is it? Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday?
— Kerry on Wayward Son (@EmissaryKerry) March 25, 2020
Tell ’em, Peters.
Me when someone asks what day it is pic.twitter.com/1lhUh4eRUh
— John Robert Allman (@Johnny_Allman) March 29, 2020
1. April showers bring indifference
At least I’m the only one who has to deal with me.
I either showered this morning or last Wednesday who’s to say? We’ll never know.
— Emily Murnane (@emily_murnane) March 17, 2020
Hope you enjoyed that list! But how long have you been looking at it? A couple of minutes? A week? WHAT YEAR IS IT?!
Any tips for keeping to a good schedule?
Drop ’em in the comments.