20 Indisputable Reasons that Cats are the Greatest

There are two rules in my household.

1) You have to love cats.
2) Under no circumstances are you allowed to love the musical Cats in any of its incarnations; it is an insult to theatre AND to felines, and I will not stand for it.
THIS IS THE HILL I WILL DIE ON.

Ahem. Sorry. Got a little carried away there. See, I just love cats so much (again, the animal, not the show), and I could probably talk about them all day. Here are 10 great things about cats.

20. They luv you

I mean…sometimes, anyway.

19. They’re unique

Felt cute, might bite you later, idk.

18. They’re dumb

In the most adorable way.

17. They are great child stand-ins

My cat is soul heir to my entire fortune at this point.

16. They encourage you to get out more

By making it clear that they need their space.

15. They’re layered

Like ogres. Or onions.

14. They clean up

Who left all this stuff up here? Don’t worry, I’ll get it.

13. They are enlightened

We really should listen to them more.

12. They’re fashionable

I would watch an entire reality show about cats in the fashion industry and so would you.

11. They’re great critics

One of the most powerful cultural voices of our time.

10. They are powerful

I once freaked out while cat-sitting and called the owner nearly in tears to tell them I thought I’d lost their kitty. She was hiding in the rafters.

9. They’re good kitties

Don’t mess with the fuzz.

8. They’re sleepy

This cat is at least 1/4 raccoon and there’s nothing you can say to convince me otherwise.

7. They have the floof

THIS IS WHY WE LET THEM GET AWAY WITH EVERYTHING, THEY ARE SO CUTE.

6. They fits

The box will always be the most intriguing part of any item for a cat.

5. They are invaders

Swiggity swooty, I’m coming for that cutie.

4. They’re good parents

Congratulations, it’s like 6 babies.

3. They have no fear of commitment

I’m so, so happy for them.

2. They can be easily summoned

What black magic is this that disturbs my eternal slumber?

1. They’re fun at parties

Screw it, I got like 7 lives left.

While writing this my own cat has been meowing at me for no discernible reason as I try to explain to her that I’m crafting a tribute to her kind. She seems unimpressed. I love her so much.

What’s the weirdest thing about cats to you?

Let’s keep this going in the comments.