There’s a very important question we don’t talk about enough: should kids be allowed at weddings? Now you might be saying “What a stupid question. Of course they should! A wedding is about family and togetherness and marking an important day in the lives of people we love!” By bear in mind that we’re not talking about kids as in high school, we’re talking children. People at the stage of humanity where pretty much all you do is scream and run and remain oblivious to social cues. Is that really an element we want at an expensive, carefully planned event?
Consider these bits of testimony from people who have witnessed the effects first hand.
10. Forever hold your peace
You know it’s bad when the minister starts digging in.
Source: Whisper
9. Separation anxiety
“What are you doing to her up there?! Return her immediately!”
Source: Whisper
8. Water wedding
I’m sure the parents were absolutely thrilled.
Source: Whisper
7. Don’t let them eat cake
It’s fine, that was only like a $400 piece of food.
Source: Whisper
6. Something borrowed, something spewed
And I’m sure you haven’t lived it down since.
Source: Whisper
5. Cower from flowers
That’s a lot of pressure on a little kid.
Source: Whisper
4. Shake, rattle, and wail
Yep. That’s what babies do. All the time. Always.
Source: Whisper
3. Ring around the rosy
We’ll circle back to this when you’re older.
Source: Whisper
2. Picture this
They were framed I tells ya, framed!
Source: Whisper
1. Beady little eyes
Water, water, everywhere, and not a drop to drink.
Source: Whisper
I don’t think we need to see any more evidence; it’s clear that weddings are not a place for kids. Henceforth anyone bringing tiny child persons to a wedding shall be sentenced to spend the entire time getting dirty looks. It is so ordered by this imaginary internet court. *gavel gavel*
But what say you, people of the jury?
Let us know your opinion in the comments.