I don’t know if you’re ready to get this news or not but um…there are single people on the internet and they have a lot of opinions about that. I know, I know, it’s shocking information and a lot to take in, but I have it on good authority that it’s true. From dating apps to relationship statuses to pretty much any corner of the net where anyone can whine, people are here to LET YOU KNOW that they are SINGLE and they have THOUGHTS ON THAT.

Take for instance these 10 tweets from REAL LOCAL SINGLES IN YOUR AREA!*

*I don’t know where they are, I’m not a creep.

10. Two for one

Plus you get twice the cool-side action.

9. Deal with it

This is what I call a slice of life story.

8. Unfolding events

We all just need to ask somebody, I guess.

7. Love me tinder

Dating app developers hate him for this one weird trick.

6. All my troubles seem so far away

This is a fool-proof plan and I fully support it.

5. Bowl me over

But do you remember it, though?


4. Best of the worst

I know a lot of couples who haven’t been able to get away from each other for 5 months who might disagree.

3. A courageous glance

You’re flirting with destiny now.

2. Forever home boy

Mr. Poofers can hear you, JESSICA.


1. Punctuate your point

We’re not gonna connect if you don’t come correct.

At least those thoughts are pretty funny. If it takes single-hood to create that kind of comedy, then I say let us all be single forever!

Are you single? How do you feel about it?

Vent in the comments.