In many, if not most, parts of the world, people assume that drinking alcohol in certain situations is the norm. It helps us connect, it greases wheels, it’s fun, it involves us in a community event, et al – and if you’re a mom, that goes double, because everyone knows that wine = mommy juice.
A reality that mom Celeste Yvonne was forced to confront head-on when she decided to quit drinking altogether.
It turns out that people think they have the right to ask you, in public and without warning, why you’re not drinking – which is bound to (and did) lead to at least one awkward conversation.
She decided it’s time to change the narrative surrounding not drinking, and her Facebook post has since gone viral.
Here’s the story:
I went to a play date the other day at someone’s house. Almost the moment I stepped through the front door, the mom giggled “Mimosa time!” and my body froze up.
I wasn’t prepared for this.
Most times, when I’m heading to a social gathering, I have time to prepare. I mentally prepare, I physically prepare (I always bring a kombucha with me), I emotionally prepare.
I think about what I will say when someone asks why I’m not drinking. I think about how deep I want to get in the conversation — because some days I’m ready to go there, and other days I want to talk about anything BUT that.
Today, because I was so caught off guard, I probably looked like a deer in headlights. I almost said “Yes” and thought about just pretending to sip it. But I said “Not right now, I’m good thank you” and the conversation veered to something else.
But it came up again about 15 minutes later. And again another 15 minutes later. And I was practically banging my head against the wall mentally thinking “why don’t I just tell her I don’t drink?”
But I didn’t. I was afraid she would think I wasn’t fun. I was afraid she wouldn’t want to have more play dates with me.
I read a meme yesterday that said “I determine my kids play dates by which mom I want to drink wine with”.
Being alcohol free can truly feel ostracizing. And it’s strange to think that alcohol is the only drug that we have to explain NOT using.
Time to change the narrative. Alcohol free is a choice that should not require an explanation, embarrassment or fear of condemnation. #changethenarrative
People have been supportive, for the most part, and agree that not drinking is a personal choice that shouldn’t be on display unless we choose to share our reasons.
People don’t need booze to have fun…
Just like people don’t need other stuff to have fun…
Lots of support is out there!
And sometimes we need to evaluate our relationships…
And also… drinking around children is kind of lame…
Why can’t we all just be adults and accept each other for who we are?
It’s not anybody’s business why we do what we do.
Image Credit: Facebook
So get out there, people, and start doing what your mama taught you to do in kindergarten…
Mind your own business!