The more aware we become of the injustices and suffering around us, the more our own pain can feel trivial.
But usually, that’s not enough to make it disappear. So what do? Enter the people of r/UnpopularOpinion.
Not everybody was thrilled with the callous way OP seemed to toss aside the horrors of human tragedy, (I sure hope you mean you DO care but that it’s not relevant to your experience in the moment) but the general message of “pain is pain and that’s valid” seemed to resonate pretty well with most Reddit folks.
1. Smells bad, man.
Yeah. Just because something smells better than sh*t doesnt mean it smells good.
2. Perfectly natural.
It’s unnatural actually not to be sad. I mean it is easier to hold your sadness if it is a little, but it is like peeing.
You can hold a little bit of pee, but you can’t hold too much pee. No matter the case, eventually you’ll need too pee, or it’ll be bad for you.
The same happens with sadness. XD
3. Why’d you let me?
Obviously. I had this with a friend a while back. We had a video chat and he was like “actually it’s pretty sh*t, my dog is really poorly and she probably won’t live more than a week or two” and I gave him sympathy because he’s sad and we chatted about that for 15-20 minutes.
Then he asked how I was doing and what was going on and I was like “pretty sh*t too, my nan just died” and his response was “why did you let me go on about my dog for so long?”.
Me being sad about something does not invalidate his sadness. The same as if he broke his ankle and I cut my arm off – one of those is worse, but me losing an arm doesn’t stop his broken ankle from hurting.
4. Oh, get over yourself.
I had a friend who was much older than me and in college (I was in high school) and they asked me how I was.
I told them stressed because of some project.
They asked me what grade I was in and after I told them they simply just told me I didn’t know what stress was.
5. A wise idiom.
I saw someone on reddit with terminal cancer reply to someone saying it puts their problems in perspective by saying “one scoop or two, you’ve still got a sh*t sandwich” and I’ll probably never forget that.
6. A loving perspective.
My fiancé says this to me all the time because she’s been through a lot more than me (rough childhood, divorced parents, then her dad died in a car crash in 2015) and I always feel guilty getting dramatic and upset or stressed out about stuff and complaining to her because she’s been through so much.
But she always says “everyone is different and what you’re going through is big to you, and that’s what’s important” She’s pretty much a saint for saying stuff like that
7. You’re allowed to feel.
different events affect different people in different ways… you’re always allowed to feel how you feel…
however personally i find it is usually good practice to self-reflect and try to keep things in perspective, for example if you are sad because you wanted a black iphone with 64gb but got a white one with 32gb instead, you can be sad but don’t expect any sympathy from anyone else, this is an im
8. But wait…
I’d like to note that a lot of people say this and then go and tell celebrities who are experiencing bad things to f*ck off because they have it worse.
9. The wrong room.
Yea I’m sick of people saying my own depression isn’t valid because there are worse off people in the world.
How come you always have to compare yourself to the worst person in the world to feel better? If you’re the best person in a room then you’re in the wrong room.
Compare yourself to your peers
10. Endless comparisons.
Is this actually an unpopular opinion? Because if so, that’s f*cking terrifying.. It basically just means nothing matters because something will always be worse. “Oh wow, you were a Jew during WWII? Try being a helpless Roman during Pompeii” “Oh wow, you were a helpless Roman during Pompeii? Try being a helpless dinosaur during the meteors hitting”.
Everything is always going to be worse than whatever happens next, and instead of doing the whole “My oppression is worse than yours” or “My pain is worse than yours”, we should all agree that all pain is bad, all oppression is bad.
Don’t make it your identity.
Unless you’re willing to remain sad forever.
You do you sadboi
12. Tea and sympathy.
Be sad all you want but don’t expect sympathy from someone who thinks your complaint is trivial.
13. It’s nonsense.
Saying “You can’t be sad, because others have it worse.” is as nonsensical as saying “You can’t be happy, because others have it better.”
It is important to have perspective, but everyone’s experiences are their own.
14. Does it go the other way?
With this logic no one would be allowed to be sad because there will always be someone that has experience something worse.
Sadness is subjective, never forget that.
15. Who’s that?
Just imagine the poor sap who actually DOES have the worst situation in the world though…
I guess if any of us get a turn at being the person who truly has it worst in the world, we’ll have to report back.
What do you think about this?
Tell us in the comments.