Let’s talk about The Dating Game. Not the old game show where people tried to answer questions as lewdly as was allowed at the time, a different thing. (Side note – did you know that show was on for TWENTY ONE YEARS? Redonkulous.)
Anyway, the Dating Game we’re talking about today is a hypothetical one posed by Reddit user TeoLikesReddit.
The prompt goes as follows:
And with that, TeoLikesReddit, who, apparently…likes Reddit, set off an endless cascade of video game-inspired dating tips.
Here are a few of the highlights.
1. Everything in moderation.
Don’t spam the ‘praise button’
– qperA6
2. Keep it put away.
From Oblivion: “People don’t like it if you talk to them with your weapon drawn.”
– CupboardNose
3. Wait, that’s illegal?
STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM
– itsybitsybosmer
4. You might get hurt.
Friendly fire is enabled watch out
– palolike
5. Hit ’em with your best shot.
If the target isn’t charmed by random animal facts, try dinosaur facts instead.
– Mamlucky
6. These are fight or flight scenarios.
Tip: Don’t Run Away Mid-sentence
– EthanC15
7. I am not throwing away my shot.
Be careful as high level bosses can one shot you.
– Bruh_Man14
8. You may not come back from this.
Remember, there is no respawning in this game mode.
– SpicyPotato100
9. Also, hold “ex” to lose game immediately.
Hold X to run away
– Daily_memes430
10. Playing on hard mode.
What follows is frontline combat.
You are not expected to survive.
– Danjlinger
11. Focus +100.
Tip: Don’t stand in one spot staring awkwardly.
Use attacks like humor, smiling, and good breath on combination with the passive ability of not looking at her chest.
– djfishfingers
12. Keep it clean.
Have you bathed today?
Bathing regularly adds +5 to charisma and +10 to tolerability.
Cologne can potentially boost stat higher but mistaking axe body spray as a shower in the can heavily reduces all stats.
– demonardvark
13. Eyes on the prize.
Remember: The goal of this game is not to win your crush.
This is a side quest.
If you treat it as the main quest, you’re going to be disappointed.
– bicyclewaffle
14. Time trials are so stressful.
Tip: remember it takes more than five seconds til a conversation becomes awkward.
Take advantage of the silence to pull off harder hitting combos!
– Migboi
15. And of course…
Don’t send dick pics
– sirmeliodasdragonsin
Words of wisdom all around. I wonder if this game is coming to the PS5? If so I might actually need to shell out the second mortgage it takes to get one.
What tips would you add to this list?
Let us know in the comments.