It’s a premise familiar to a plethora of retro adult films. A patient goes to a doctor, apparently sick but also surprisingly sultry and healthy looking. And it’s not long before all the touching and the examining turns into something else entirely.

It’s so contrived and cliche that at this point it feels entirely like a joke, but what’s not a joke at all is the huge crush that some people can develop on their doctors in real life.

Fantasies are wishes expressed vividly, after all, and a lot of people are seriously wishing that dirty movie premise would come true for them. Just check out these real anonymous confessions.

13. “I get all flustered”

Which probably gets in the way when you’re actually trying to express what’s wrong.

Source: Whisper

12. “Only 10 years older…”

An age differential is a surprisingly common factor with these.

Source: Whisper

11. “A little too fast”

“Is that your medical condition in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Source: Whisper

10. “My secret…”

But is it his secret as well?

Source: Whisper

9. “It’s sad”

I mean, it’s not THAT sad.

Source: Whisper

8. “I fantasize…”

Ok on the real though, can we talk about how Doctor Who was always cucking these guys?

Source: Whisper

7. “He actually remembers me!”

I don’t want to crush her dreams and tell her about the existence of charts.

Source: Whisper

6. “For over 20 years.”

That’s a long time to hold onto something.

Source: Whisper

5. “I fake illnesses”

He’s gonna catch onto that if he hasn’t already.

Source: Whisper

4. “I always make up things”

Again, please don’t do this.

Source: Whisper

3. “It’s the first attraction I’ve felt”

And that one hits you the hardest.

Source: Whisper

2. “I’m a patient”

But how patient can you be?

Source: Whisper

1. “I’m actually nervous.”

Like it’s a date or something.

Source: Whisper

The doctor will see you now.

Have you ever had a crush like this that felt inappropriate?

Tell us in the comments.