Yanno, humans are supposed to be like the pinnacle of social animals – effectively dominating the planet not because we’re the biggest or the strongest or the fastest, but basically because we have thumbs and we’re good at cooperating.
And yet, when it comes to interacting with anyone you don’t already know well, all of that just kind of flies out the window. You forget how talking works. You have no concept of proper etiquette. You kind of just turn into a rock with social anxiety and there’s no one to save you from it.
Luckily, you can always take to the internet and share your weird interactions with the world like these people did.
12. The network
In case you didn’t know…
I hate networking pic.twitter.com/FaOMQVJDT9
— Adam Karpiak (@Adam_Karpiak) September 30, 2020
11. Hamster dance
How do you ever recover from that one?
I saw a girl carrying a hamster so I asked if I could pet it but it was actually a muffin so I'm on my way to jump of a cliff now
— Hannah Durant (@hdurant) April 18, 2017
10. Going up?
I thought it was the start of something beautiful. That’s what I get for believing.
The elevator doors opened up and a
guy walked in the elevator. It was just
me and him in there and he said "I love
you." And I'm not rude so I said "I love
He gave me a weird look and pointed
at his Bluetooth.
— arnulfo (@chatodauto) August 2, 2018
9. Hold me, touch me
Well, did anybody come by to help you out with that?
Meant to say “hold on for a second” and “give me a minute” to a customer and it came out as “hold me for a second”
what a monday
— kbtest (@kbtest11) September 17, 2019
8. Soup’s on
Soup is more powerful than most of us give it credit for.
hyukjae: one time i went to hand someone a bowl of hot soup and my brain tried to say "careful it's hot" and "here's your soup” so instead i blurted out "careful, it's soup"
— ?????¹⁵?|?️?pride month?️? (@my_gucci_burned) January 22, 2021
Well, that taught me more than I wanted to know.
I surprised my Girlfriend at work this morning.
Came up behind her and kissed her on the neck
She Laughed and said “Mike stop you know we’re at work”
My name is Brandon pic.twitter.com/FS1OD343rf
— BJay Thee DJ (@B2daJay) June 7, 2019
6. Other people’s’ business
You don’t know what you’re getting into, kid.
tonight I walked past a couple fighting on the street corner and my tipsy ass yelled “just hug it out” and the girl replies “you wouldn’t be just hugging it out if your sister was due in 5 months with your bfs baby now would you becky” and I OOP
— keepin up wit Raquel (@Raquelhinkson) June 23, 2019
5. Ruthless efficiency
The problem is it’s probably still gonna work on at least one of them.
4. An intriguing tale
Come on, you gotta tell me more than that.
3. New developments
Look, nobody’s gonna respond to that anyway.
2. The thread
Lots of great ones here.
1. The spoonerism
I do not like the cone of fart.
Like I said, humans don’t know how to human.
What’s the weirdest social interaction you’ve ever had?
Tell us in the comments.