There are some truths you just can’t learn in a classroom, or from parental advice.
There are some truths that come to be felt in your bones – and they are gleaned from experience. Terrible, deep experience. Like working retail, for example.
There are some bits of wisdom that only those who have stood face to face with the customers can claim, and these tweets express them.
10. The solidarity phenomenon
Thank you for reassuring me that I’m not the crazy one here.
no better feeling than when you've just dealt with an absolute cunt of a customer and the next person in the queue is like "what the fuck was their problem" THANK YOU i love u xxx
— lil quorn piece (@_andywat_) November 25, 2018
9. The empty shelf
I know not what is, I know only what has been.
This employee at Target just did me SO DIRTY!
I asked her where the bread was, she said, “follow me.”
She took me about three aisles over and pointed to an empty shelf and said “that’s where it used to be”
LMFAOOOOO I couldn’t help but laugh 😆
— Freeasiaa (@freeasiaa) March 25, 2020
8. Main character syndrome
The world literally does not revolve around you.
People who say “you just lost a customer” to retail employees when they don’t get their way have the most severe case of main character syndrome.
— lizzo supremacist✨ (@NikkiCallowayy) September 10, 2020
7. The expertise vortex
Only in America would one assume that a private business controls health outbreaks.
customers really come up to me and ask “when this whole covid thing gonna be over?” Lmfao bro idk let me go ask my manager
— adri (@rofnl) August 5, 2020
6. The mental health paradox
What we mean is that we don’t want you to complain anymore, not that we want to help.
EVERY COMPANY: We'd like to promote mental health in the workplace.
EMPLOYEES: How about hiring more people so we feel less pressured & increase our pay so we can keep up with the spiraling cost of living so we're not so stressed out.
EVERY COMPANY: No not like that. Try Yoga.
— Patrick so gay (@PatJD) March 20, 2019
5. The support-manteau
They’re the little Freudian moments we all let slip.
Meant to say “hold on for a second” and “give me a minute” to a customer and it came out as “hold me for a second”
what a monday
— kbtest (@kbtest11) September 17, 2019
4. The Purge mentality
Come on, please? We could get so much more done.
the Purge but instead of killing for 24 hours we get to talk to customers the way they talk to us
— Amy Carroll (@Carroll_Amy_) November 9, 2018
3. The Spongebob case
“I can read, I just don’t want to acknowledge anything.”
Spongebob is a documentary about working service/retail pic.twitter.com/k1aN2kZlY3
— camnzr | BLM 🍯 (@CamiloNazar) January 26, 2021
2. The closed satisfaction
We do have limited hours, you know.
When a customer tries to walk in but the door is already locked: pic.twitter.com/VA8czPAyt9
— €lizabeth (@elixabethh___) September 9, 2019
1. The reinforcements
It’s nice to have somebody with real power on your side.
When a customer wants to speak to the manager and the manager just tells them the exact same thing you did 😂 pic.twitter.com/GEg8ADTiyV
— Funny Tweets (@WhySoFunnyFor) September 5, 2016
Can’t deny a single one of those – deeper truths have yet to be found in any Holy book. Is that too far? I don’t think so. Retail is a purging experience.
What’s the worst job you’ve ever had and why?
Tell us about it in the comments.