I don’t even know how it happened, honestly, but somehow I recently managed to lock myself out of my Twitter account.

I can’t remember what series of events led to this self-sabotage. I’d changed the password, I’d forgotten it, I’d let Chrome pick a strong password for me but then I forgot to tell Chrome not to forget so we both forgot how to remember?

In any case, I found myself casually clicking over to Twitter before realizing “Oh man, this is gonna be like a whole thing,” but it’s a fight I fought. Why? Because good tweets are worth it, by gum. They’re worth it.

10. Catch up

This is a really weird version of the “evolution of man” diagram.

9. An ally of the light

Neat-o, which dialogue option do I choose for student debt relief?


8. Keep it up!

Speaking of which…

7. A horse of a different color

Samwise carries Frodo up the mountain (colorized.)

6. Analyze that

We have the same thing we just call them pundits now.

5. Prepare thyself

There’s really not a reason for everything.


4. Fun and games

I was aware of that, thank you.

3. The power grid

You mean a buff pancake?

2. TP or not TP

It’s my number two priority.

1. Look sharp

But what if I’m neither one?

Good thing I got my password debacle worked out. Can you imagine what my life would be like right now had I missed those bangers? Unthinkable.

Who are your favorite people to follow on Twitter?

Tell us in the comments.