The term “landlord” feels so pretentious and outdated now, doesn’t it? Some high and mighty descriptor of a feudal lord, overseeing his kingdom. When most of the time it’s just, like, some jerk named Dave who takes four days to text you back about your broken sink.

I’d say that if we’re still gonna have such a thing as “landlords” floating around, we need them to earn that title.

Will the people in these Reddit and Twitter posts stack up to the challenge? Let’s find out.

12. Carpet bombing

Perfect, there’s no way anybody could notice that.

Just moved into a new home and found where the landlord patched the carpet. from mildlyinfuriating

11. Hook you up

I wouldn’t be mad about this as long as the pressure was good.

When I told my landlord my shower head was leaking, he said he was going to hook me up. This is what I came home to. from pics

10. That’s methed up

I love that this isn’t even him asking them to stop selling meth, just to be better at it.

Landlord put this up cuz the neighborhoods won’t stop selling meth from facepalm

9. The hose knows

That thing’s got more kinks than a leather night club.

Moved into a new house. Landlord said water the lawn, we left you a hose. from Wellthatsucks

8. Rat me out

Hope you didn’t name them yet.

NYC landlords like… from LandlordLove

7. Paying your dues

It seems that compassion is really a hallmark of the profession.

Found this note in my mailbox from my landlord today. Too awesome not to share! from pics

6. Old and moldy

Yeah and I’m paying you a bunch of money to live in it so let’s get with the times.

5. The landlord special

Nothing an umteenth coat of paint won’t fix.

4. By the numbers

Numbers 18:21 – “To the Levites I have given every tithe in Israel for an inheritance, in return for their service that they do, their service in the tent of meeting.”
Yeah I can totally see why that means I need to give you an extra $130 a month, Rick.

3. Staying plugged in

I’m not even kidding, this person should spend time in jail.
That is straight up reckless endangerment.

2. Rage in a cage

It’s getting hot in here, so go pick all the locks.

1. Am I right or I am right?

“Here, go buy yourself half a gumball in 1983.”

Final score: none of you get to be lords.

What’s your worst landlord experience?

Tell us in the comments.