Sometimes when you find yourself at the tail end of a relationship, you just have to console yourself by saying “Don’t cry because it happened, smile because it’s over.”
‘Cause there are certain relationships that DEFINITELY needed to end.
Reddit has got breakup stories for days. Be warned – some contain some pretty heavy stuff.
1. The prude
When he didn’t want to have s** because he was grossed out by my period that I had finished three days prior.
Noped out of that one real quick.
2. The Mega-Karen
1st date was probably a big red flag, but I shrugged it off. We had connected on Facebook and she noticed that she went to college with a girl I went to high school with.
No big deal, until I found out she had been messaging that girl and asking her all these questions about me in high school… who did I date, what car I drove, etc.
Anyway, third date rolls around I wasn’t really sure how long we would be together so typically I wouldn’t have taken her to a really nice restaurant so early in a relationship, but I was in the mood for steak so I took her to a pretty high end steakhouse.
I have never been more embarrassed by someone’s behavior in public in my life, and I have a 6 and 3 year old at home now. She sent 3 martinis back because they weren’t made correctly while being extremely insulting and rude about it. She ordered a steak medium and then got pissed because she insisted she ordered it medium rare. Both the waiter and I told her she had ordered medium. She was making comments about what other women in the restaurant were wearing, and not very subtly. Then, despite me trying to get out of there without buy her desert, she got a desert menu and expected them to make her something that they didn’t have on the menu. They had cheesecake and she wanted chocolate cheesecake. Another outburst at the staff. On the way out the door she made a point to stop and complain to someone loud enough other customers could hear.
When we got into my car I was so embarrassed I pretended I had left my credit card on the table so I could go back in. I gave the waiter an extra $20 and apologized, telling him I was dumping her as soon as I got to her place. He laughed and told me he wished he could see it.
I didn’t really give her a chance to say much. She called me a loser and stormed off. Havent seen or heard from her since.
3. The dream killer
We were 5 days into a relationship and work was going to have me move “somewhere” and I said we should do long distance for a while.
She wasn’t particularly fond of that idea and told me she would just drop her PhD program to move wherever with me. After 5 days…
4. The control freak
He wanted me to grow out my pit and leg hair and texted, called, and emailed me repeatedly about it.
It seemed like a pretty silly thing and he just had a little fetish but after several days of this my sister said, “Why do you always attract the controlling freaks?” and I finally had a moment of clarity.
5. The mama’s boy
He was working and then had enough money to move out but he told me he would stay with his mother forever because she cooks and do the chores for him.
6. The threats
Married for six years. Started out thinking she just struggled with depression and anxiety sometimes, but things kept escalating.
I walked away when she started threatening to stab me in my sleep.
We had already tried several couples therapists and individual therapists, but she refused to consider medication. I called her to meet up and try to find some closure, but she cut me off telling me I wasn’t allowed to leave her and as punishment she was sleeping with two other guys.
At that point I just ignored her number and filed for divorce. Hope she’s doing well, but glad to not be afraid for my life!
7. The abuser
When my now ex wife came in to the living room where I was sleeping on the couch after a fight and started lunging at me.
She asked me if she reminded me of my stepdad who used to come in my room at night and stand over me before he dragged me out of bed by my ankles. He would then put the boots to me for whatever sins I had committed that day.
She was the only person I had ever shared this with. She went out of town for work 2 days later and when she came home I was gone and in another state.
It was remarkable the amount of abuse I put up with to that point. It dawned on me then that if he had returned to my life I wouldn’t let him hurt me so there was no reason to let her abuse me either.
8. The instigator
She kept waking me up over and over all night trying to have an argument with me.
The argument was about me going to sleep.
9. The very confused White Knight
We went to the mall and stopped by this little kiosk selling cookies.
I decided that I would get one cookie. The lady working there said if I buy 2 I get one free. I decided to buy two and get the third one free.
My date WENT OFF on this lady saying she’s trying to scam me etc etc. He was legit yelling so loud that it was echoing through the mall. It was so embarrassing.
If you’re rude to people in customer service, you’re not for me.
10. The time traveler
Followed me to a night out, got on his knees stopping traffic in the middle of a city center street to declare his love.
We had been on two dates.
He also told me that same night he could see into the future and already knew he was going to die defending my honour while I was carrying our twins.
Yeah… he was fun
11. The alcoholic
She came to stay for the first time. It was the night before new years eve and we were planning to go out drinking for new years eve. I had just worked a 12 hour shift, carpet fitter so manual labor so I was exhausted.
She had a few drinks and started to get aggressive because I wanted to just relax that night but she wanted to go out drinking.
We broke up 3 days later. My father was an aggressive drunk when I was a kid so I could see how it would go… If you know you’re an aggressive drunk, get off the drink man.
12. The delusional
Showed up late at my place one night because she couldn’t sleep at her place alone. I was fine with that until she started talking about the reason why: when she was alone, the demons in the corners and edges of the room would fill the dark spots and watch with their glowing eyes.
Urged her continuously to get help, to go to the doctor but she wouldn’t do it — what she was seeing was real.
I felt terrible leaving her for that but I wasn’t equipped to deal with someone who needed professional help and refused it.
13. The jealous lover
I dated this girl who was jealous, and I mean SUPER jealous. I couldn’t hang out with my friends without her constantly calling me (obviously I couldn’t do the same, because how could I be jealous, that would’ve meant I didn’t trust her).
That’s annoying enough to end a relationship, but it was just the tip of the iceberg. After 9 months, I found out from one of my friends (who also happened to be a close friend of hers) that she had been hiding her sexuality to me (she was actually bi). At first I really didn’t get why she did that, because I absolutely have no problem with these things.
Mutual friend then told me that she was going around f**king other chicks. So basically she was hiding her bisexuality so that she could have s** with any girl she wanted to, without me even suspecting anything. Sometimes she even had threesomes with the girls’ boyfriends.
When I told her I knew everything, she started telling me that she didn’t want me to know because “those other people didn’t really matter for her and she didn’t love them”.
Needless to say, I noped the f**k outta there
14. The “joke” strangler
We weren’t in a relationship but I had a developing thing with a guy once, until one day when I wasn’t around he and some other friends of ours went to a bar and he sneakily slipped stronger alcohol into some other girl’s drink there.
This girl apparently was talking a lot with one of our other friends and not showing much attention to him, so he got jealous and threw this friend on the floor and started to strangle him. He was obviously thrown out of the bar after that and later tried to play it off as ‘just a joke’ and ‘just messing around.’ How do you jokingly try to strangle someone anyway???
Anyway I dropped this guy out of my life right after I found out. I definitely wouldn’t want to be stuck with someone like that.
15. The ball of anger
After our second date, we were hanging out with mutual friends. I was teasing another guy about something very trivial.
Guy I had been seeing walks up to me, grabs my wrists and starts screaming in my face to apologize for disrespecting his friend. I left.
He called me later, crying and apologizing.
Nope. Just nope.
Some wise nopes right there.
What’s a reason you had to nope out of a relationship?
Tell us in the comments.