If you work in a restaurant, one of the easiest ways to pass the time is to become a professional people-watcher, and some of the scenes you see unfold are truly remarkable.
That’s why I’m excited to this question asked on reddit:
Check out these crazy date stories courtesy of the servers of Reddit.
1. So high end.
I worked at a higher-end restaurant as a busser for a while, and eventually was given a chance to serve in the bar area while a jazz band played. Most of the tables were just drinks and appetizers.
My first shift a woman in her 40s or 50s came in with a tall, dark, and handsome guy no older than 30. Nothing wrong with that in my eyes, but all of my interaction with them was the woman talking down to me on some sort of power trip (maybe to prove to her guy that she’s an alpha female or something, dunno) and her ordering everything for her date. They had cocktails, ordered a bottle of wine, and had a couple entrées.
She ordered ahi tuna, RARE. She was very insistent on the rare, so much so that I put blue rare into the computer so everything would be fine. She sent back 4 separate plates (all too well done) to the absolute horror of her date. I informed her after the second that they wouldn’t be taken off her bill, and she scoffed and made some comment about how she’s loaded and it doesn’t matter.
After the four plates, she sent the last one back and asked for a shrimp cocktail instead. I left them to enjoy the music, brought the check, and when I came back to pick it up, her date was gone, and I don’t mean, went to the bathroom or went for a smoke, all of his things were gone and he was nowhere to be seen for 30 minutes.
She apologized to me and asked if I could take the ahi tuna (~$45 each) off of her bill. Told her to pound dirt. Not really, but my manager did.
Next day she wrote a 500 word review about me, using my first name, on the restaurants Facebook page. My boss printed it out, framed it, and I still have it today.
2. Cool down, you two.
A teenage couple sharing an ice cream and holding hands very awkwardly.
After they finished the ice cream they kept talking about their – very adventurous – sexual fantasies.
They were around 14 years old. Super awkward to have to interrupt them to ask if they want anything else.
3. Nobody look.
I had these two people that were there on a first date.
After the appetizers this poor man got the sh*ts and was going back and forth to the bathroom all night.
There was only a few other people in the restaurant at the time so it was noticeable and they were chuckling everytime he got up. I honestly felt so bad for the guy.
4. The mix up.
At a restaurant i worked at, there was a white guy and a black guy on a first date. They were sitting in a booth and having a good time.
White guy gets up to go to the bathroom. When he came back he sat in the wrong booth with a different black guy.
Took him a minute to realize it was a different person. The person he was on a date with was not happy at all.
They tried to salvage the date, but it didn’t work.
5. Dine and dash.
At the end of the dinner, 2 couples on a double date dine and dash. I chased them down, and the girls had no clue, their dates had told them they already paid.
The girls ended paying, the guys had no cash.
6. Obviously stood up.
Not a first date, but when I first started bartending I had a woman who was very obviously stood up.
She got there, ordered a drink, and would look around every once and awhile. I saw her use her phone a couple times and her mood just got sadder until she finally put her phone upside-down on the bar and ordered food an hour later.
I wiped what I could off her bill then paid the rest myself, told her it was on the house. In my career it’s happened two more times, once with another woman and once with a guy. I did the same thing. Nothing sucks more than eating alone and defeated.
7. Outta cash, outta time.
The guys card declines. I didn’t want to embarrass him so I waved him over near the credit card machine so it would look like he needed to go to the bathroom. He told me to try it again and I assumed he was going to move money over on his app.
He went back to his date. Card declines again. The machine prints a receipt that states the reason for decline… “insufficient funds”. I keep trying 4 more times. I go over to the table and say “I’m having an issue with the card, might be our machine, do you have another?”
I walk away with the new card, and it declines. I wave him over. He gets up angrily and I’m guessing now the date has caught on. He proceeds to berate me saying that it must be our machines because HE KNOWS HE HAS MONEY! He starts making fun of me questioning if I know what I’m doing. He is doing this in front of his date I’m guessing to save face.
Gives me another card. Declined. The date pays….
8. Love me tinder.
I worked at a bar where like 50% of our business was from Tinder dates.
This one time, two guys came in separately and sat at different tables by themselves, along the same wall. They were both facing the door and clearly waiting for dates.
Eventually a woman comes in, walks up to the closest guy, sits down and they start chatting. They start ordering drinks. After ~5 minutes, the other guy, who is still waiting by himself, gets up and walks over to the couple. He says ‘hi’ to the girl and is like ‘um aren’t you so-and-so? …I’m so-and-so we were supposed to be meeting?’ She was clearly flustered, lots of awkward laughter, and she gets up and goes with the other guy to the other table.
Couple minutes later the other woman shows up and sits with first guy and he tells her all about it. Lol
9. Craigslist personals.
Lady comes in to get a table says she’s expecting a man and gives us a brief description. He shows up about 10 minutes later and she starts saying she knew it, he looks very surprised and scared. I took a drink order and when I get back they are gone.
The hostess fills me in that in my absence they had a heated but civil exchange, the man was married to the lady’s cousin also the lady was married.
Apparently they had been texting for a while after meeting via Craigslist personals. I’m assuming the married but looking section. Don’t known if they hooked up in the end or just called the whole thing off.
10. Let them not eat cake.
In short, he got there early and let me know it was a first date which was a lunch date.
When she got there they started chatting and he ordered a drink and she ordered a water. After a few minutes he skipped on appetizers and every so often I would go by to see if they would like to order. She would open her mouth to speak and he would interrupt with something like they were fine at the moment.
Well this went on for a while, I even tried to just take hers but he would insist they were okay for now. So he kept ordering drinks and she kept sipping water. After an hour or so she said she had to go and just left.
He asked me if he did something wrong. I answered honestly with “since it was a lunch date she probably didn’t have too much for breakfast and if you offer a lunch date she’s probably expecting to eat and you wouldn’t allow her to order, she’s probably starving” he sat there and drank till the end of my shift.
11. The label debate.
The guy starts talking about how nice it is in the modern day that you can just date without labels.
Woman, in suspiciously chipper voice responds that sometimes labels are really helpful in defining the boundaries of the relationship.
Man, very upbeat replies that SOMETIMES it’s nice just to enjoy your time with someone without having to define anything… it was so hard to listen to!
12. Started off great…
The date I saw started off great . . .
I was playing in a band at a small club. There were about 30 people in the club. A couple who had been sitting close together in a corner booth disappeared together into one of the bathrooms.
In between songs, when it was quiet in the club, the bartender yells, “They better not be in there f*cking on my sink!”
The whole place turns and stares at the bathroom door, and as we’re staring, the couple emerges, smiling at first. Then they look around, see everybody staring at them, and their faces turn a deep color of shame.
They quickly paid their bill and left.
13. The Valentine’s incident.
I used to work at a Mexican restaurant and one year when I was working on Valentine’s I was subject to one of the weirdest first dates ever.
A couple walks in, she is dressed to the nines, like she’s ready to hit up a club. He is dressed more casually, in jeans and a button-down. Our hostess seats them and when I go to greet them the man announces that this is their very first date! The lady looks less than impressed and gives a small smile, more like a grimace. They order drinks and as I’m watching their table you can tell that the date is not going well. The guy is talking animatedly and the girl is glancing around like she’d rather be anywhere else.
I head over to take their order and it’s clear that I’ve interrupted something. The guy looks a little embarrassed and sad and the girl looks p*ssed off. He orders his meal and she flippantly orders something (seafood enchiladas) without really looking at the menu. She tosses her menu in my direction and sucks down the rest of her drink. Okaaaaay then.
I deliver their food and go back behind the counter to continue rolling silverware and watching my tables. They dig in and the man seems to be enjoying his food, his date looks disgusted and is flicking bits of her dinner around the table/floor. I walk over to check in and see if she maybe wants to order something else. I get to the table to ask how everything is and she gets up, SCREAMS that her food is DISGUSTING, and goes OFF about how sh*tty this date was. She started yelling at him about how he should have ordered for her, how dare he take her to such a low-class place, she was so done with this, blah blah blah.
She shoves her plate away, gets up, and storms out of the restaurant. The dude is mortified. I tell him I’ll be right back with the bill and would he like his food boxed up? This f*cking guy shakes his head, pulls her plate towards him, and says nope, he’s fine to continue eating the meals he’s paid for.
He stayed for the duration of his meal. I never did find out what happened to the lady. We talked about that incident for WEEKS after!
14. Old flames.
I was the one on the first date.
Went to a bar with this guy, our waitress came up and immediately recognized him, was super friendly, took our orders and left.
While she was gone he told me they used to date. The rest of the night they openly flirted with each other.
There was no second date.
15. Wrong tree?
Saw a guy hitting on a girl and buying her drinks for the entire night, then realizing she was a hooker.
And that’s just scratching the surface.
What have you seen/overheard at your job?
Tell us in the comments.